Switches Are Bitches: An Ode

Switches are bitches,

That much is true.

‘Specially when whipping

Down onto you.

You plead and plead

For mercy, you beg,

Convinced that you’re bleeding

And at least, half-dead.

Hands fly back

And legs kick high-

It never misses the mark,

No, not even one time.

There’s a lesson here, somewhere,

You know that there is—

Soon as you learn it

That switch, it’ll quit!

So concentrate—

OUCH! YELP! And EEEP!

Not it, yet, no—

OW, OW!! and BLEEEEEP!

Well, that didn’t work,

But you got it soon after;

Sorry, sorry, and on

You blather.

Finally, finished,

Oh, my, Thank GOD,

Finally stilled, that little rod.

You learned two things,

Both vital to know—

Don’t do it again,

And, then, also:

Switches are bitches,

That much, it’s true.

SPECIALLY when whipping

Down onto you.